My Favorite Sandwich

Charlie can't say "french toast sticks" (what a dummy... I mean, he's two now for goodness sake) so he calls them boo-boo sticks, whiiiich is pretty cute. I eat three of them and I'm full, and he's going on number five at the moment. Baby Update: done.

My life has consisted of these three things lately:

...though I've not actually played the Zelda one yet because I'm still, you know, catching 'em all. My boyfriend-given birthday 3DS isn't going to waste, anyway! I may or may not have ordered a decal from eBay in the shape of the Hylian Crest for to decorate my 3DS, because just having the 3DS doesn't proclaim my legitimate nerd-ness clearly enough, being an almost 30-year-old woman and all.

So then. Once upon a time, Bruegger's Bagel Bakery used to have this bagel sandwich called The Mediterranean, back in the early 00s. It consisted of a, uh, bagel stuffed with muenster cheese, lettuce, red onions, hummus and this sundried tomato spread that I would have eaten with a spoon out of the dang jar given the chance. I'm pretty sure the bagel was a cheese-kind, too. Of course it was discontinued, liiiike every food that I fall madly in love with (other such delicious things include Jones Chocolate Fudge Soda, Doritos "The Quest" Mountain Dew Flavored Chips [which, to be fair, was just a promotional thing] and Taco Bell mother effing 1/2 lb Cheesy Bean and Rice Burritos). Jesus, a real picture of healthy cuisine over here. Whatever, food.

We're moving an hour north next Wednesday and I'm nervous and excited and nervous. The kid wants to play, which I can tell by his grabbing my hands and whining, trying to close the laptop and saying "pum on!!!" (translation: come on). We're gonna go play with cars, okay?

Happy Friday!

Enchanted Polish - May 2014, June 2014 and July 2014 Swatches & Reviews

Heeeyoooo.

I was in my first online semi-argument with a delightful gal in a CVS couponing Facebook group in which she suggested I stick coupon tearpads up my hindquarters and find a male chicken to entertain myself with (note: paraphrased for the younger readers). The thread was sadly deleted, but it all started when another member of the group called a fellow out for selling coupon tearpads which he very unlikely procured legally. Some members were saying there's nothing that can be done about it and that our having a discussion about it was a waste of time. Long story short, my whole thing was that regardless of HOW wrong what he's doing is, it's still wrong. Then we had the whole "there are murders happening and you're worried about THIS?" comments. I just... I guess I'm lucky to have been raised with a conscience and a clear outline of the difference between right and wrong. I'm not saying that coupon fraud is on the same level as murder, but it's still a crime, you know? Shoplifting something for $2 isn't a major offense, but it's still punishable by law, dawgs. 

I mean seriously. Hrrgrgg. The worrrrsssst are comments that are like "you're stupid for spending time arguing about it blah blah blah". Like, what are you LITERALLY doing right now? I just can't even.

So anyway, Enchanted Polish Monthly Mysteries versions May, June and July; editions 2014: I'm slightly underwhelmed.

May is this pumpkin orange jelly with some linear holo and that sparkle I always talk about that EP has, except in pink. It has a lot more dimension on the nail than my photos show; it almost looks like a glass fleck buuut not. This one had the best formula -- two easy coats and required zero cleanup. I like this one the best out of the three which kind of indicates my underwhelm-ed-ness since I'm pretty "meh" about orange in general.

Shown below is two coats without topcoat.

Sunlight

Sunlight

Shade

June is a plum-my purple/berry pink metallic duochrome with linear holo and that pink sparkle action. It reminds me of all those purple-toned multichromes except instead of going all the way to gold, this one stops at pink. The formula wasn't as smoothy-smooth as May but it was still pleasant.

Shown below is two coats without topcoat.

Sunlight

Sunlight

Shade

Shade

Shade

While this one is the most interesting in terms of what's going on in a nail polish, I'm not in love with it like I think a lot of people are. Some people, maybe. A few. I don't know if it's the shade of purple or what, but I was just kind of like, okay, neat. *shrug*


July 2014 is a metallic bright cherry red with linear holo and pink and blue sparkle which very barely shows up on the nail. Pretty basic and uninspired-feeling, which bums me right out since July is my birth month and I was hoping for something blam-tastic. I don't, like, LOVE rubies or anything, but I kind of wish this was a jelly instead of being metallic to emulate July's birthstone more. Deep cherry jelly with red shimmer and linear holo... that's a monthly I would campaign for, yo. I don't hate this polish, but I don't see myself reaching for it anytime soon. The formula on this guy was also pretty suck -- quite goopy compared to what I've become used to with EP formulas. Sigh for days.

Shown below is two coats without topcoat.

Sunlight

Sunlight

Shade

The shade picture definitely makes it look a lot more interesting than it actually is, just FYI. If it looked like that IRL I would be all about it.

Aaaanyway, that's that. Five more months of this mystery stuff and I kind of think I might be done with Enchanted Polish. Unless something in the next five months blows me right the heck away, I'd rather spend my dolla-dollas on polishes that I know I'll love.

A Story About China Glaze - DV8

Once upon a time Brandy bought China Glaze DV8 (along with a few other pretty fantastic polish finds, as can be read all about here) during her first dusty hunt. She swapped DV8 and another  hard to find polish for a few rad polishes with a delightful Canadian.

She went back to the salon to buy another bottle of DV8 but the one the salon owner had out was only about a quarter full. She bought it anyway since it still had a few good manicures left in it, despite the extreme goop-factor. She added some polish thinner in an attempt to restore the precious little bit back to its original holographic glory, but the thinner instead separated the shit out of the polish and made it the most depressing little bottle of nonsense in existence. 

http://www.sadtrombone.com/

A few months later Brandy pops into the salon just for funsies and lo and behold a brand new bottle of DV8 is sitting proudly on the rack. She scoops it up with utter glee, only to be told that it wasn't for sale because it was "popular with the customers". Endless sigh.

Fast forward one year: DV8 pops up on Storenvy for cheap. Brandy buys it despite being preeeeeetty broke whilst having an unknown amount of moving expenses coming up later this month, a-heh heh ehhhh, because birthday present to herself! My birthday was yesterday, and now I'm in my last year of my twenties which is completely f*cked up in every way imaginable. 

Hey, uh... also my blog turned 1 on July 7th. Wooooo! Don't people usually have giveaways for this sort of thing? Man, sorry about being so lame, guys. Once we're all moved into our new place, and I have this new baby, and all the kids are in their teens and self-sufficient and whatnot I'll figure out how to do a giveaway, and I'll give things away sooooooo hard.

^ you guys ^

So I'm sitting here, eating Herr's Kansas City Prime Steak Flavor potato chips and Old Towne Chocolate Fudge Soda (ever the unfailing stereotype of pregnancy), getting all amped up to play Animal Crossing New Leaf on the Nintendo 3DS my boyfriend got for me for my birthday (which I've wanted for three years, mind). My EPs better McFreaking come tomorrow... mail's been kind of weird lately. Tracking is all like "oh, girl, you'll get your stuff by so-and-so day!" and then I DON'T. But when I do, I'll swatch them for you, even though it seems like everybody is selling them off. I wish the Enchanted Polish Mystery Monthlies were as exciting as her random collabs/site exclusives, you know? Meh. Meh for days.

Welp, time to go catch beetles on the island for mad bells. Kiss kiss.

Pahlish - Mystery Holo Swatch & Review

Today's my baby's birthday. He's two years old!!! So technically not a baby anymore, blah blah blah, he'll always be my baby and all of that. For you I have a whole slew of unprompted freak-faces from the birthday boy himself (who's currently taking a birthday nap [edit: he literally woke up four seconds after my typing this sentence which is why it wasn't published until after 7 PM], which is why mommy is able to update her blog with A REAL LIFE NAIL POLISH SWATCH!!!!!!) Behold:

He's actually pretty cute in real life.

Anyway... today, for you, I have a mystery polish from Pahlish which are basically prototypes and "oops" batch bottles. There are three kinds to choose from: creme, glitter and holographic. I went with the holographic because doy.

The mystery holographic I got consists of a cardboard brown sheer-ish base with medium linear holo, gold glass flecks and strong golden shimmer. I've wanted a good holographic nude-y shade for a time now, so I'm pretty pleased with what I received. Also ohhh my goooddddd I'm so glad my nails are finally growing out. 

Shown below is three thin coats without topcoat under OttLite.

It's, like, butterscotch-y kind of, and the flecks are subtle but they add dimension on the nail, girl, you KNOW? It's got a lot going on, but everything works together so nicely that, like, whatever that it's got a lot going on. 

I.. um.. my birthday is on Thursday and my dad and stepmom just dropped off the baby's present (a Fisher Price trampoline that is AWESOME) and some birthday money for me and I kind of want to go to Ulta, like, right now. So I'm, like, gonna.

Hey... what's going on, guys? How've you been?

Oh... hey... I have a blog.

So I'm still pregnant, and right now I'm watching Chopped and literally dumping the last crumbles from a bag of Snyder of Berlin Vlasic Dill Pickle Flavored Potato Chips into my gaping maw.

Let me tell you a story about my first pregnancy. About half-way in, I was stricken with a sudden and desperate craving for a Taco Bell 1/2 lb cheesy bean and rice burrito, so I went through the drive-through and was told that the 1/2 lb cheesy bean and rice burrito had been discontinued THAT VERY DAY. I begged him to make one anyway, and was told that it wasn't possible because they didn't have all the ingredients anymore (which I later found out was a lie from the pit of hell) so I held back tears and ordered a seven layer burrito and nachos.

At boyfriend's house to eat, and I could only make it through the burrito, but I have this habit of assigning personalities to inanimate objects, so I started to feel guilty about ordering nachos but not eating them. But I really didn't want them, and my boyfriend didn't want them, and then he decided to give them a sad, little voice, talking about how excited they were that they were chosen and how important and special they felt, and then how utterly devastated they were that I was basically abandoning them to suffer in the trash, alone. My boyfriend loves to tell this story, especially the part where I break down and sob uncontrollably for 15 minutes because of how I've wronged nachos.

He burned me an apology CD later, titled "Cry all you want to; Nachos don't have feelings".

Sometimes when I laugh really hard during pregnancy, my brain's brain strokes out and I start crying instead. Like, not crying and still laughing, but pathetic sad-crying. The most recent culprit of emotional fudgery was due to this little gem:

I'm talking about my boyfriend a lot lately, god, sorrryyyyy, but he was talking the other day about how cats are the glitchiest animal, which I think is a perfect descriptor. They're all graceful and shit, but the second even the tiniest thing goes wrong they're just done for. Cats are weird, guys.

So nail polish. I bought the three most recent Enchanted Polish mystery monthlies and they had better rule so hard. I also bought, kind of a while ago, this Pahlish mystery holo that reminds me of DS Illumination with subtle linear holo. It's pretty... MAYBE I'LL SWATCH IT SOMETIME. I didn't tell you, but just after my last swatch, I broke two nails on my swatch hand and hacked all my nails off all gone. But now they're growing back, but they're still stumpy, and I wish my nail beds didn't grow practically out of the very tippy-tops of my fingers. :(

My blog has over 23,000 views on it, which I nev-er imagined possible. I feel like I just started gaining a bit of a readership (thank you! Brandy loves you!) and then I get all pregnant and drop the blog-ball.

I'll make it up to you.