Orly - Just Peachy Swatch

Don't go getting used to this two-days-in-a-row crap. Der Boyfreuden is working late tonight, the kids are asleep and I only have like 20 more minutes of the finale of Top Chef Season 10 so I was all like, "Oh I know, I'll swatch this polish that I've had for-ehhh-ver".

I put up a DISO* post in a nail polish facebook group I'm part of, basically begging for Orly - Just Peachy. Remember that whole thing, like six months ago or whatever? A darling babe actually sold it to me, under the conditions that I would neither 1. resell it for any sort of profit and 2. not love it. Cool man, right?

Just Peachy is kind of a tricky polish in that it was never a part of any collection by Orly but rather manufactured without hitting the market and instead sent to discount retailers like TJ Maxx (or possibly only to TJ Maxx... I don't know that I've heard Just Peachy being spotted anywhere besides) which is d to the umb because it's freaking DANG. You've got this bright, warm pink base packed to heck with gold shimmer, right? And it's a texture polish too, which you and I both know that I am ALL about, girlfriend.

Shown below is two coats with topcoat under OttLite. I added topcoat because it brings out the color of the shimmer in photos.

Ughhh. I can't wait to use my regular watermark font again, side note. Pretty fabulous though, right? And I'm starting to really love the shape of my nails, now. Plus they're super good for scratchin'. Super happy I got my grabby-hands on this little friend without having to cut off my foot or whatever bizarre sacrifice I was willing to provide to the giver-of-the-polish.


*Desperately In Search Of, ya donk.

ORLY - Pink Crystal Swatch & Review

1. I found out from this blog post that ORLY sends polish colors that didn't quite make it to market to discount retailers like TJ Maxx and Marshalls (except, apparently, to the ones in all of flipping northeast Ohio) to be scooped up by fancy polish connoisseurs.

2. I couldn't find it around me (see above) but one popped up on Storenvy! Scoop!

3. I guess go ahead and google another one of these kinds of ORLY rejects called Just Peachy if you want to quietly sob while gently stroking your computer monitor. I love Pink Crystal, don't get me wrong, but I would seriously consider cutting off one of my toes for Just Peachy. A toe, guys. If you think an actual human toe is a fair trade for a bottle of nail polish, please get a hold of me immediately. We can hash out the deets lates.

ORLY - Pink Crystal is a super-sparkly cool-toned berry pink texture polish with gold shimmer. The shimmer was much more apparent in real life, of course. The formula was great and super easy to work with and the little texture chunks dispersed evenly.

Shown below is two coats in direct sunlight.

With topcoat (under OttLite, which for some reason brought the gold out more than sunlight):

Uh, yeah, right? And this for some reason didn't make the cut? What the heck, ORLY?  Even mind-blowinglier was that Just Peachy didn't make it. What doofus looked at those two polishes and was like "no, you know... I just don't think there's a market for these".

ORLY! I AM YOUR MARKET FOR THESE! HI, I'M BRANDY!

So you pretty things, keep your eyes peeled for awesome little treasures like this floating around at your local TJ Maxx and Marshalls. If you find Just Peachy, don't even tell me unless you plan on having one of my toes.

Easter Candy Nail Art

Happy Easter!

I'm the kind of mom who shares a pint of Cherry Garcia with her 21-month-old while watching Grey's Anatomy. Just a little bit of insight into my parenting style, here. I obviously don't have major issues with our kids eating crappy food in moderation, but Lord knows my threshold for a sugar-induced house-destroying running-around-squealing eff-fest is only about 28 minutes, so I'm not real big on kids + candy. That being said, with the abundance of grandparents involved in our blended family, there's going to be crap tons of Easter candy in this house soon and I'm gonna eat it all and the kids won't even KNOW.

Okay, I probably won't eat it all. I don't know. I can't predict the future, guys.

I'm not real big on pastels. Bunnies and duckies and flowers and little cracked eggshells with cute little black peepers peeping out are all super sweet and adorable and Easter-y, but candy.

As a true blue-blooded American, I wanted to go as commercialized as I could with this manicure. It's how we roll.

Valentine's Day = Chocolate & Roses
St. Patrick's Day = Beer
Easter = Candy

I'm pretty sure it's written in the Constitution. We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, do candy for Easter and stuff. And dye eggs. Amen.

Actually I think that's the whole thing.

So anyway, God, this post is such a mess. I did NAIL ART on my NAILS and I will show it to you now.

L to R: Cadbury Mini Egg [the cop-out nail], Jellybeans, Chocolate with a Bite Taken Out, Bunny Peep.

The jellybeans look less suck in real life, promise.

O hay guise.

So there we have it. Candy on my nailz. Not the cutest, pastelest thing in the world, but it works for meee.

Colors by Llarowe - Young Turks and The Mighty Red Baron Stripe Nail Art

I bought Young Turks and The Mighty Red Baron a few weeks ago and somehow haven't done anything with either of them despite their awesomeness. I also bought Sally Hansen - Lick-O-Rich (bluuuughhh) for $.90 at Big Lots to use pretty much for this exact reason. I love texture stripes over regular polish. I heart it!

I used two coats each of Young Turks and The Mighty Red Baron, applied the tape, then carefully painted on one coat of Lick-O-Rich (the formula for the Colors by Llarowe polishes is freaking spectacular, by the way).

I wish my nails were, you know, the same length and all. I have no idea for what occasion I could possibly wear these (oh, you know, a funeral maybe... job interview...) but I like them. And I like feeling them. Since stopping biting my nails I've become a nail-messer-with. I fidget around with them constantly. Texture polish is like tactile crack to me.

The mooore you knooow!

Serum No. 5 - Shrinking Violet Swatch & Review

My pinkie nail finally broke. ENDLESS WEEPING. At least the break isn't as deep as my nails usually break, but freaking STILL. The teabag fix worked like a charm for four whole days.

Today I have a Spring-y little polish from Serum No. 5 Love Lacquer (whom I haven't tried before) called Shrinking Violet. It's a very pale pearly pink-lilac base with purple and sky blue hex glitter and gold micro glitter. The formula was pleasant but the polish is quite sheer and the glitter a bit sparse so if you're not into the semi-opaque look it would best be suited over another light color. It does build to opacity but it takes a while though since the formula was so workable it wasn't an endless process.

Shown below is four coats with a layer of Essie G2G.

I had Nicole by OPI - On What Grounds from my March Ipsy bag laying around so I decided to add some textures tips just cuz.

That photo kind of shows the base color a little more accurately. It's pretty but I think it's maybe too dainty for me, especially with the NOPI added. Man, that little pinkie nail is so sad. It's even blurry, to add to its sadness.

St. Patrick's Day Nail Art

Hey! Hey, guys!

Once upon a time I used to celebrate St. Patrick's Day the only way Americans know how: green wearin' and copious amounts of alcohol starting at the crack of dawn, usually in the form of Killian's, Guinness and Baileys or any creative and shudder-inducing combination of the three. St. Patrick... Patron Saint of hangovers.

Now I'm all old and wrinkly and fun-resenting (but hangover free, bitches!) and I celebrate St. Patrick's Day by making corned beef and cabbage (the recipe is, like, a freaking book and kind of all over the place but i results in DELICIOUS WONDERS). Holidays seem to be the only thing inspiring nail art out of me these days. Meh. Too busy being a grumpy old person I guess.

I started with a base of Essie - Good As Gold and after that was completely dry I used page hole reinforcements to tape off  at the base of each nail. Then I applied two coats of Sinful Colors - Emerald Envy. For the accent nail, I just used my super fancy DIY detail brush and, starting at the cuticle, painted rainbow arches! I had this really great idea to use the reinforcement labels so that the arches would be super crisp and perfect buuuuut no. Nope. Too impatient for that noise.

The rainbow consists of:
Formula X for Sephora - Hyped
Color Club - Wild at Heart
Colors by Llarowe - Young Turks
Sinful Colors - Happy Ending 
Cult Nails - You're My Dandy Lion 
Essie - Meet Me at Sunset 
Colors by Llarowe - The Mighty Red Baron 
..and a coat of Essie G2G

Uh, yep! That's a potato.

Finger Paints - Hammered Terra Cotta Swatch & Review

I have one of the new textured additions to the Finger Paints core line today called Hammered Terra Cotta. True to its name, HTC is a textured metallic copper (think brand new penny) with small gold hex glitter. Application was a breeze, free of texture bump-clumps and opaque in 2 coats.

The first two pictures shows two coats only. The color is brighter and more metallic looking in real life.

(I forgot to take a third picture without topcoat. Oopsie.)

The next set of pictures shows two coats with a coat of Essie G2G on top. I KNOW I STILL NEED TO GET GELLOUS.

Top coat deepens the color and gives it more of that terra cotta shade. I really like this polish overall-- it's one of those colors that when it's on I find myself looking at throughout the day, all finger-wiggly and stuff. I love the addition of the gold glitter. My only qualm is that I wish the bottle had any indication that this was a texture polish. I know there are a couple others, but there are a few colors that I'm not sure whether they're just glitters or what. As much time as I spend with nail polish, you'd think I'd be able to tell these things.

Tape & Texture Polish Rainbow Chevron NOTD

I love chevrons, okay? Like, a lot.
They make even sad, small nails look rad. And they're easy with tape.

The thing about texture polish is that it dries super fast, plus it's textured. It's easy to bump the brush of a different color against the dried already-painted section so I don't have to go crazy with the tape. Loads easier to work with than non-textured polishes and the result is just as awesome.

For this manicure, I used good old Scotch tape aaand (starting at the cuticle):
Sinful Colors - Got a Blush on You
OPI - Jinx
Ulta - unnamed lime green texture
Sinful Colors - Emerald Envy
OPI - Alcatraz... Rocks
L.A. Girl - Sands of Time

And with a couple layers of Essie G2G for good measure: