Funky Fingers - Unicorn Farts Swatch & Review

 

So mainstream polish brands are hopping on board with the whole Unicorn secretion thing now. That's neat.

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When I saw this polish in the bottle at Five Below yesterday I was like:

And I guess I kind of thought maybe I could use it in a super creative way and, you know, place the glitters all pattern-y and stuff. I will literally never do that, I realize now. My nail polish ambitions are pretty low, guys. Or maybe one day I will and completely exceed your expectations! Juuuust maybe...

Anyway, Unicorn Farts is a rainbow assortment of one size of hex glitter. The glitter is a curly nightmare, first of all. And the clear base that the curly glitter lives together in is pretty thick. And the only way you can somewhat successfully use this polish (besides that fancy placement shiz I seriously promise you I will never actually try) is the fish-dab-fish method. You know that one? That's the one where you poke around in the bottle in hopes of grabbing a big ol' glob of glitter which, once you wipe off on the neck to be able to pick pieces up without having mostly base, immediately fall back into the bottle. I started using my thumbnail as an artists palette, as it were, to get glitter on the brush. And then I would anti-methodically place the glitter on the nail.

This is why I don't do tutorials, okay? You're welcome.

Shown below is that^ over Zoya - Raven with Essie G2G haphazardly slapped over top in a feeble attempt at getting the glitter to lay flat. It's too bad curly glitter looks so dang cool.

I don't know what else to say. This is going to be one of those polishes that I keep just to look at once in a while, and kind of for the name too.

St. Patrick's Day Nail Art

Hey! Hey, guys!

Once upon a time I used to celebrate St. Patrick's Day the only way Americans know how: green wearin' and copious amounts of alcohol starting at the crack of dawn, usually in the form of Killian's, Guinness and Baileys or any creative and shudder-inducing combination of the three. St. Patrick... Patron Saint of hangovers.

Now I'm all old and wrinkly and fun-resenting (but hangover free, bitches!) and I celebrate St. Patrick's Day by making corned beef and cabbage (the recipe is, like, a freaking book and kind of all over the place but i results in DELICIOUS WONDERS). Holidays seem to be the only thing inspiring nail art out of me these days. Meh. Too busy being a grumpy old person I guess.

I started with a base of Essie - Good As Gold and after that was completely dry I used page hole reinforcements to tape off  at the base of each nail. Then I applied two coats of Sinful Colors - Emerald Envy. For the accent nail, I just used my super fancy DIY detail brush and, starting at the cuticle, painted rainbow arches! I had this really great idea to use the reinforcement labels so that the arches would be super crisp and perfect buuuuut no. Nope. Too impatient for that noise.

The rainbow consists of:
Formula X for Sephora - Hyped
Color Club - Wild at Heart
Colors by Llarowe - Young Turks
Sinful Colors - Happy Ending 
Cult Nails - You're My Dandy Lion 
Essie - Meet Me at Sunset 
Colors by Llarowe - The Mighty Red Baron 
..and a coat of Essie G2G

Uh, yep! That's a potato.

Sinful Colors - Pride Swatch & Review

HEY.

I GOT COLORS TODAY.

Sinful Colors - Pride is red and pale yellow and green and blue and magenta hex glitters in varying sizes suspended in a slightly thick, clear base. I have a couple other polishes like this (Ulta - Pinata-Yada-Yada and Milani - Gems) but this one definitely has the best glitter payoff. The formula isn't unbearably thick, either. I feel like this would be perfect for a glitter gradient!

Swatches show Rejuvacote as the base, a thin layer of Essie - Waltz, three medium coats of Pride and no topcoat.

For good measure, I then added a thin layer of Essie - Waltz. I looooove how it dulls the metallic shine of the glitters. This reminded me of a more muted China Glaze - It's a Trap-eze, which I don't yet own but have been considering getting. I have such a thing for glitter in a white base, which I'm sure I've said before.

Party on my nails!! This was, however, a little bulky what with the layers. In the future, I'd probably be a little lighter-handed with Pride and stick to using it as a full-coverage polish as an accent nail or two.

Tape & Texture Polish Rainbow Chevron NOTD

I love chevrons, okay? Like, a lot.
They make even sad, small nails look rad. And they're easy with tape.

The thing about texture polish is that it dries super fast, plus it's textured. It's easy to bump the brush of a different color against the dried already-painted section so I don't have to go crazy with the tape. Loads easier to work with than non-textured polishes and the result is just as awesome.

For this manicure, I used good old Scotch tape aaand (starting at the cuticle):
Sinful Colors - Got a Blush on You
OPI - Jinx
Ulta - unnamed lime green texture
Sinful Colors - Emerald Envy
OPI - Alcatraz... Rocks
L.A. Girl - Sands of Time

And with a couple layers of Essie G2G for good measure: